On Inherited Frameworks For Life
“If the path before you is clear, you’re probably on someone else’s.” Joseph Campbell
As we grow up we inherit a particular set of guidelines and frameworks for life—many of which shape how we view ourselves, others, and the world around us. These frameworks come from those we grew up with, shaped by their own beliefs, experiences, and even the emotional and psychological readiness (or lack thereof) they brought to parenthood. Our sense of self is formed not only through their reflections and observations but also through the biases they inherited from their parents, influenced by historical, cultural, and personal contexts.
The Layers of Inherited Beliefs
Who we are today is a result of generations of accumulated frameworks and scripts for life. These layers include:
Cultural Narratives: The societal norms and values passed down through generations.
Family Dynamics: Beliefs about what it means to be “good,” “successful,” or “worthy” within a family system.
Caregiver Contexts: How our parents’ moods, emotional availability, and life circumstances influenced what they modeled for us.
For instance, what made sense in your parents’ context—whether it was prioritizing safety, pleasing others, or suppressing emotions—may have been their way of adapting to their circumstances.
Context Matters
These frameworks were shaped by a different time, place, and set of challenges. People around you might have modeled behaviors that were essential for survival in their world but are limiting in yours. Perhaps their focus on perfectionism came from a need to prove themselves in an unstable economy, or their reluctance to show vulnerability was a protective response to trauma.
While these patterns were adaptive and may have helped them navigate their lives, they may no longer align with the person you want to be or the life you’re striving to create.
Recognizing What No Longer Serves You
One of the most transformative insights in personal growth is realizing which inherited beliefs and patterns are standing in the way of the life you want to live today. These might include:
Ideas about your worthiness tied to productivity or achievement.
Fears about being authentic because of a learned need to please others.
Scripts about relationships that prioritize self-sacrifice over mutual respect and care.
By identifying these influences, you can start to distinguish between the frameworks imposed upon you and the framework that truly aligns with your authentic self.
Living from the Core of Who You Are
Our lives are happening now. While we cannot change the past, we can give ourselves the chance to become fully ourselves. This involves consciously choosing a framework that arises from your core values, desires, and truths—not the outdated patterns handed down through generations.
This process takes time, curiosity, and courage. It means asking yourself:
What beliefs about myself or the world feel misaligned with who I am today?
What values truly resonate with me, independent of what I was taught to believe?
How can I start making choices that reflect the person I want to become?
Moving Forward
Shedding inherited frameworks doesn’t mean rejecting our past or the people who shaped us. It means honoring their experiences while creating space for your own. The goal isn’t to blame but to understand and consciously choose the framework that allows you to thrive in the here and now.
You have the power to create a framework that reflects you—your values, your dreams, and your truth.
If you want to embark on that exploration together, reach out today! Let’s begin!