Believe You Can: Overcoming Learned Helplessness
When was the last time you decided to try something for the first time, something you’ve never done before? What is the internal narrative that follows your desire - is it supportive and encouraging, or does something in you decides you shouldn’t even try, because “what’s the point?” If you notice that discouraging voice leading the show most of the time, you might be experiencing learned helplessness.
What is Learned Helplessness?
Learned helplessness is a psychological state where an individual believes they have no control over their circumstances. It’s a lack of belief in our own agency and ability to make choices. This belief can lead to feelings of hopelessness, apathy, and a lack of motivation.
It's an internal script that says “you won’t succeed anyways so what’s the point in trying.” We learn to expect failure and difficulty, so we don’t even try.
How does it become our inner script?
Learned helplessness occurs when individuals repeatedly experience negative events that they believe are beyond their control. Over time, this repeated exposure to uncontrollable outcomes can lead to a belief that their efforts are futile, and they become passive and resigned to their circumstances.
Here are some factors that can contribute to learned helplessness:
Repeated failure: If individuals consistently experience failure in their attempts to achieve goals, they may begin to believe that their efforts are doomed.
Lack of control: When people feel they have no control over their situation, they may become more likely to develop learned helplessness.
Negative reinforcement: If individuals are punished for their efforts, they may learn to associate their actions with negative consequences, leading to a sense of helplessness.
Observational learning: People can also learn helplessness by observing others who exhibit learned helplessness.
Pessimistic explanatory style: Individuals with a pessimistic explanatory style tend to attribute negative events to internal, stable, and global factors, which can increase their vulnerability to learned helplessness.
It's important to note that learned helplessness is a learned behavior, and it can be unlearned with appropriate interventions.
How Does Learned Helplessness Manifest?
Learned helplessness can manifest in various ways, including:
Avoidance: People may avoid challenging situations or tasks because they believe they won't be successful.
Procrastination: Putting off important tasks or responsibilities due to a lack of belief in one's abilities.
Low self-esteem: Negative self-talk and a belief that one is incapable or undeserving.
Depression: Feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and worthlessness.
Applying Learned Helplessness to Your Life
Understanding the concept of learned helplessness can be a powerful tool for breaking free from its grip. By recognizing the patterns of thought and behavior associated with this state, you can begin to challenge these beliefs and take steps towards change. Here are some examples of how you can apply the concept of learned helplessness to your life:
Identify negative thought patterns: Pay attention to the thoughts you have about yourself and your abilities. Are they primarily negative and self-defeating?
Challenge these thoughts: Instead of accepting negative thoughts as fact, challenge them with evidence to the contrary. Are there times when you've succeeded in the past?
Set small, achievable goals: Start with small, manageable goals to build your confidence and sense of control. As you achieve these goals, you can gradually increase the level of challenge.
Seek support: Talk to a friend, family member, or therapist about your feelings and experiences. Having someone to support you can make a big difference.
Reflection Questions
Do you recognize any patterns of learned helplessness in your own life?
How might these patterns be affecting your relationships, career, or personal goals?
What steps can you take to challenge these patterns and regain a sense of control?
Remember, breaking free from learned helplessness takes time and effort. Be patient with yourself and celebrate your progress, no matter how small. Give yourself a chance and try something new without focusing on the outcome!