When it comes to healing from trauma, many people feel an overwhelming urge to “fix” themselves and get through it. The initial reaction is often to do more—to read every book, attend every workshop, and analyze every moment of their past in an effort to move beyond it. While education and active self-reflection have their place in making sense of what happened, one of the most underrated aspects of healing is the exact opposite: resting, doing less, and slowing down.

As the year winds down, many of us find ourselves naturally reflecting on what’s passed and wondering about the road ahead. This transition can be bittersweet, marked by both accomplishments and challenges, joy and sorrow.

While we can’t control what life throws our way, we have an incredible power: the ability to choose how we respond and how we show up for ourselves in the midst of challenges.

Being important to yourself is not about turning into a selfish, grandiose prick and neglecting or devaluing others—it’s about valuing yourself enough to make space for your own needs. By recognizing your own self-worth, you’re better equipped to bring your best self to everything you do.

Back in the day, FOMO was a survival tool. If your tribe was doing something important—hunting, gathering, forming alliances—you had to be there to stay relevant and safe. Fast forward to now, and that instinct has morphed into feeling like you need to be at every event, trying every trend, or keeping up with every social circle. But guess what? Your brain hasn’t caught up with the fact that not attending Rachel’s bottomless mimosa brunch won’t lead to exile.

Complex or developmental trauma is a type of trauma that occurs over a prolonged period of time, often in childhood, and involves repeated exposure to harmful events. This can include physical, emotional, verbal or sexual abuse, neglect, or witnessing violence. These types of difficulties and neglectful experiences disrupt natural development and make us adapt to our environment by creating strategies for survival. In a sense, we learn who we need to be in order to survive in our families of origin.

It feels good, in the short term, to get that nod of approval, a “thank you” for your efforts, or avoiding upsetting someone. But here’s the catch: people pleasing isn’t as harmless as it seems. It’s often rooted in fear—fear of rejection, conflict, or simply not being liked. While being considerate is one thing, putting others first all the time can leave you feeling drained, unheard, and resentful.

Depth and insight-oriented therapy offers a powerful pathway to self-discovery, enabling clients to delve into the layers of their experiences, beliefs, and conditioning. This approach emphasizes overcoming the influences of our past—family dynamics, cultural expectations, and early life experiences—that subtly shape our behaviors and perceptions in the present moment.

We’re conditioned to believe that happiness and satisfaction are waiting for us in some future moment when things change in our favor. What if we don’t have to wait? What if anything we long to experience is available to us right now?!

Letting go of the struggle can feel like surrender, but it’s actually an empowered choice. It means we’re attuned to what’s right in front of us, taking the steps that feel grounded in clarity and aligned with our inner needs. It’s a way of honoring ourselves, of giving ourselves the space to breathe and feel at peace with where we are.

Worrying, especially when it’s repetitive and unresolved, can feel like we’re doing something productive. It feels like we’re keeping ourselves prepared, looking out for the worst, or being realistic. But here’s the truth: worry on its own doesn’t change anything. We can think through every worst-case scenario, but until we put our thoughts into action, nothing actually shifts in our world.

Intention is the invisible force that drives our actions. It's the energy, the feeling, the motivation, and the purpose behind what we do. When we act with positive intention, we infuse our actions with positive energy. This positive energy can manifest in countless ways, such as increased motivation, improved relationships, and greater overall well-being.

Journaling is for anyone, it’s easy to start, and you don’t need to have any special skills to get started. If you’re feeling resistance to journaling, it’s normal, but don’t decide ahead of time that you don’t like. Give it a try! Take these reflections as gentle reminders that there’s no perfect way to journal. Whether it’s through a gratitude list, freewriting, or even doodles, a journal is a space just for you—flexible, nonjudgmental, and supportive.

For most of us, discouraging ourselves and believing disempowering stories about who we are and what we’re capable of comes easier than building ourselves up! We swiftly talk ourselves out of following our heart’s desires and giving ourselves a chance at something new. We give too much power to the voice that says; “What’s the point?,” “Why bother?,” “It’s gonna take too long,” “You’re too old for that,” or “That’s a stupid idea.”

While TikTok and Instagram have opened up valuable conversations around mental health, they cannot replace the depth, structure, and safety that therapy offers. Mental health is complex, and it requires professional attention and individualized care. Relying on social media influencers for advice on issues as serious as trauma, anxiety, or depression can be dangerous and ineffective in the long run.

Post-traumatic growth refers to the positive psychological changes that can occur in individuals who have experienced a traumatic event. It involves the development of new perspectives, increased appreciation for life, and a deeper sense of purpose and meaning. While not everyone who experiences trauma will experience post-traumatic growth, it's a testament to the human spirit's incredible capacity for resilience.

We all have expectations and secret agendas of what we believe should be happening for us. From what we think our morning coffee should taste like (come on, burnt pot!) to how we imagine that big date going down (cue butterflies and fireworks). But here's the thing: expectations can be sneaky little buggers. Sometimes, they set us up for a major disappointment when reality doesn't quite match our perfectly crafted mental picture. We've all been there. The clash between what we expected and what actually happens can leave us feeling frustrated, defeated, self-righteous, and entitled.

Gap theory of happiness posits that our unhappiness stems from the discrepancy between our current reality and our idealized version of life. We're always looking outward, focusing on what we don't have: better jobs, more money, more recognition, or simply more free time. When our lives are consumed by this constant pursuit of "what could be," we operate from a place of lack and dissatisfaction.

Have you ever heard someone say, "Go live your purpose" and wondered, "What is my purpose?" Perhaps you are multi-passionate and have a wide range of interests and “finding” your purpose doesn’t seem like a clear and straight forward task. The concept of purpose can be elusive, ambiguous, and ever-shifting.

Creating new habits and shifting old ones can be challenging, but it's definitely achievable with the right approach and mindset. Unfortunately, many people make common mistakes that hinder their progress. Here are five of the most frequent missteps and what to do instead.

Have you ever felt like you're stuck in a never-ending self-improvement cycle, but instead of feeling more at peace with who you are, you keep finding new deficiencies to “work on” and end up feeling worse about yourself?